Mood Swings

[Jason]

Hi all and i hope you are all keeping well

If none of this makes much sense i am very sorry but i just am not quite sure how to put this.

just would like some help if at all possible or some advice as i aint qiute sure how to handle this so i would be grateful if and entirely thankful to anyone who can help.

I have recently started to have a few difficultys at home and generally i tend to blame myself as one minute i am seem to be all happy laughing and joking etc and the next thing i just seem to turn becoming very snappy and short tempered i mean i am happy when i am working at least when i work i dont think of anything i just keep my head down and work as hard as possible but my problems seem to start when i get home.

Recently i have started to have alot of rows at home usually this has not happend as im usually not one to argue and generally think that i am a pussycat recently though i just seem to turn suddenley becoming very silent and very sullen and if anyone seems to talk to me i just snap it could be one of many things due to going through a lot of splits as i seem to get involved with the wrong ppl also the fact that since i split from my ex a year and half a ago and i have tried to move i just really have not found it easy as i still miss her also the fact that i am not frightend to admit is that i tend to be a wee bit paranoid at times as due to being hurt i now find it hard to trust anyone and to befriend anyone actually the thought of friendship turns my stomach and the thought of loving someone has turned me right off wanting anyone in my life its like at work i refuse to make friends at my new job as i was really friendly with a girl i worked with at my last place and it ended going really bad when i got turned on for no reason without an explanation as to what i did wrong and it did hurt as i was really fond of her but this just seems to be a continued problem for me where i get involved with the wrong ppl and i do find increasingly difficult to meet or talk to anyone and i just dont wanna feel like this.

i really wish i knew what to do as i am now getting a tad desperate and am worried about falling back into my old habits such as self harm and as i have recently started to punish myself as i feel i deserve it by starving and just putting myself down all the time.

i know there are people worse off then so i am by no means am i being selfish or thinking of myself just wanna know if anyone has any advice on what to do as i have tried everything and so if anyone knows what i could do i would be entirely grateful for some advice etc.

take care all

Jason

[swelegant]

((((((Jason))))))

You poor thing. Have you seen a counsellor about this? If not, i really reccommend that you do. I think you need to sort out your feelings properly and try and figure out methods to relieve stress and sadness other than cutting or starvation.

Here are some links and numbers that might be able to help (I'm assuming you're from the UK)
http://www.edauk.com/
MIND: 08457 660 163
Resources and Information (http://www.selfinjury.freeserve.co.uk/resources.html) MDF (http://www.mdf.org.uk/)

I hope some of this helps! Best wishes

[littlebabynothing79]

Hi Jason...
I just think sometimes we blame ourselves for things that are totally out of our hands. I think life is like a constant learning curve. I think the hardest thing in recent years for me esp and some of my friends is the ability to find 'yourself' and understand why you have these emotions and mood swings. Why do I one day wake up fine and the next? You know? Its not in your hands at all. Some people blame it on diet. I think thats true to an extent..but if you're not happy with yourself and the people closest to you..it does make things 10x worse. You have no one to confide in. You start cutting cos you feel you're not wanted and that you're a bad person. Its not all stictly true though:) It just takes a lot of getting used to. I know I'm always waiting for something bad to happen..cos thats the way things have been.

I dont think you're the only one who fears love and friendship. I have been a couple of rships which have only lasted a couple of weeks, primarily because I dont feel comfortable with that person. Then I end up breaking their heart and in turn that makes me feel bad. I think I've learnt from that mistake anyhow. My bf and I have almost been together for 3yrs.

You cant force emotions to happen. If you're angry you have every right to vent your views. If you want to cry (I know men dont like crying) but it does help alone or not. Sometimes the most reassuring feeling is to know that there is someone else out there who likes the same things as you and has a personality that compliments yours...

But I think about 99% of the population have fears...fears relating to emotions...loneliness especially..

{{hugs}}
zoe